Greg and Joy, married for 10 years, share what they’ve learnt about praying as a couple.


It has been said that God is always speaking to us. I always hear of cases where He communicates with people through visions and thoughts derived from dreams. For us, our dialogue with God has never been as dramatic. We have always yearned for a way of speaking with God that is a two-way exchange; one where we could pose a question and He would answer. But what we have learnt is that God speaks to us all the time. It is only whether we open our ears to listen.

God speaks to us, not only when we need our questions answered. Sometimes, He reaches out to someone else through us. I remember a time when the story of Job was the first reading for the day. Nothing major struck me about it, but when I met with a friend who was struggling that day, I shared about the story of Job and it triggered his great faith in the Lord.

We have learnt that the ability to listen starts with our hearts being cleansed with the act of confession. When we are in sin, we block ourselves from the two-way communication with God. It becomes us telling God, “Listen Lord, your servant is speaking”, instead of “Speak Lord, your servant is listening”.

We must remember that God replies us in His time. There could be other areas of our lives that we need resolution with before we can get a reply from God to a specific question that we may have. It was after confession that I opened my heart to God’s graces, presenting a small window of opportunity for Him to pry me open and resolve my personal issue, while allowing me to be open to His calling and listen to Him.

The personal communication of our spouses with God can also be a confirmation of God’s communication with us. The message could be the same, but conveyed through different passages that strike us on different days. Often, we as couples are just going with the motions, unable to relate to each other by listening, being understanding, and appreciating the struggles of each other. When we are more open to listen to God and pray as a couple, it helps in building our own relationship and even build intimacy with one another.


Photo: VITA Images

Archdiocesan Commission for the Family

Archdiocesan Commission for the Family